Parenting 101, Rites of Passages: Family Vacations
I was lucky enough to go to Northern Michigan every summer as a child to the Petoskey/Harbor Springs area. Some of my best memories of my childhood were from Northern Michigan as my parents often recall and reminisce. Most of the memories are the good ones, you know, roasting marshmallows, parades on the 4th of July, taking rides in the boat, or just hanging out in the yard with no agenda whatsoever for the whole week.
But every once in a while a story gets told that doesn’t always paint me in the best light. Like the time I cried the entire 8 hours home because we didn’t stop at the playground near the cottage. I stopped crying when we reached Dayton.
Every time I heard this alleged story I would laugh, and have that smile on my face expressing, “Mom, Dad, you were great parents. Thanks for putting up with me, I can’t believe I did that.”
Warp Speed ahead we have two kids of our own now. Logan is 21 months, and Henry is 5 months.
Long story short, we just got back from a week trip to Charleston, SC. Let’s put it this way, if my parents were to tell me the same story about me crying the whole way home from Michigan, I just might cry myself.
Don’t get me wrong. The trip was great. We got to catch up with my whole family including brothers and sisters, and nieces and nephews. Logan had a blast playing all day, swimming, and being spoiled by his grandparents. Henry had a blast just being held all the time, and getting constant attention. I had a blast golfing, swimming, spending time with my kids, my wife, and my family. Page had a blast too spending time with the kids and family, getting some sun, and a little shopping.
So we drove to Charleston. It was about 650 miles, 10 to 11 hours long. We’ve made 8 hour road trips often, so we figured this was nothing. We woke the kids up to leave at 6 AM figuring they would go back to sleep, but they didn’t. An hour in to the trip, just long enough to get away from any Walgreens, Logan gets motion sick and vomits all over himself and his seat. So we get off of the next exit. I hacked in to our secured roof-top carrier and got some spare clothes and I headed into the gas station to get some Dramamine and some air fresheners. They had no Dramamine so we hopped back on the highway and waited by a Walgreens until they opened. We got back in the car and were on our way. But then the portable TV in the car went black. After the kids ears popped 25 times through the mountains we made it, all in once piece, but scarred for life.
After the dust settled, and we got situated, the next day the whole family ventured into downtown Charleston for a historic horse carriage ride. At the time it seemed like a pretty good idea. Horses are cool, carriages have forward motion, and an animated tour guide is talking the whole time. Ten minutes in, after Logan threw his sippy cup at an 80 year old woman in front of me, he was done. So Logan and I jump ship, and walk next to the carriage for the remaining 50 minutes. I don’t know if it was the 95 degree weather, me holding Logan and power walking just to keep up, or the mean looks from the 80 year old woman, but I was determined to find resolve.
Later that night when the kids were in bed, my sister said, “Kevin, when I used to fly with the kids I would worry about the entire flight and everyone on it. I would worry that I was bothering them, or that they were annoyed with my kids, or that the pilot was going to do an emergency landing because row 14 was crazed by loud kids. But eventually I learned that I didn’t have the mental energy to worry about them, I could only worry about my own family, and make sure I was doing everything in my power to make them happy, and if I can accomplish this, everyone around is probably happy too.”
In the end the trip was great. We learned some good lessons for the future. We learned that you can’t go into a family vacation with the same expectations you would have prior to kids. We learned you have to truly think about what activities you do. Though the carriage company said their tour was “kid friendly,” I should have known that doesn’t apply to 21 month olds. We learned that sometimes you can’t do everything you want to do, because a quiet afternoon at home might be the best situations for the kids. We learned to be equipped with Dramamine and a change of clothes that are accessible. And finally, we learned that it’s our turn to instill these memories in our children, because our parents made the sacrifices to do the same for us.
Cheers to our first lessons in, “Parenting 101, Rites of Passage.”
